Over Atieno’s existence in the universe, they’ve served as reluctant arbiters, deciders of fates, someone to intermediate, odd diplomat, unlikely teacher (who you might go a little..too far if you get too close to them), guide, goddex. The point is that they’ve had a lot of roles in order to occupy the time - anything they could slip in and out of in terms to study the ways that beings interact.

Especially since that they are going to be roaming throughout the multiverse more often than not, they don’t mind picking up the occasional role just to keep things interesting.

They have more than enough knowledge in a wide variety of areas that they could fit into whatever kind of deal that they choose to participate in. And that’s the key for Ati doing anything, it has to be a choice or else they will happily fuck off somewhere and not give a damn. They really have no qualms from just ghosting on someone when they are trying to tie them down to anything.

Who are you even to try that on a force of this size, of this importance? Even if they don’t really come out and say it, most of the time - they are doing a small favor to people when they choose to take on a role of some kind, even if there is a certain curiosity that drives most of their decisions to do so.

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Secret 

Atieno is actually pretty good at keeping people’s secrets. Whether it’s because they genuinely relish privacy or don’t give a care about spreading information if it’s not worth sharing, isn’t exactly clear. But they have been known to have a lot of secret information over the years that they sometimes recall just to have something interesting to ponder over in their more idle of moments. Their own secrets tends to revolve around that need to be vulnerable that they have but don’t actually indulge in often, also the fact that they’ll always have a fondness for the forces of Oblivion since they see a lot themselves in them and vice versa.  So if nothing else, they have some fascinating if dangerous connections there.

Laughter

Atieno does enjoy laughing, they have several means of laughter. One is kind of a low smirk, a chuckle that’s dark and warm and kind of endearing to listening to. When they get bust out laughing, their voice still has that darkness but it leaves much more of a choral tone - of a being way too large, way too much but they are sharing some kind of joy. It does have something of a dissonant tone (more so if their laughter is harsher in its origin) but if it’s a genuine amusement, their laugh has that otherworldly massive in it’s tone - it just resonates through the core of anyone who gets to hear it

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Love.. While it’s something that they try not to put too much focus on due to the nature of their way too long lifespan, Atieno does enjoy the feeling of being loved and cherished now and then. This sort of love can come in platonic and/or more familial forms and they are often more likely to engage in such situations because it’s easier to have those kinds of bonds. They are just more comfortable engaging with them.

However, this does not mean that they care not for romance. They do cherish it and relish it when it is available to them. It’s just often, they don’t feel like it’s something that anyone would be looking for in the likes of them. It’s hard for them to feel like that they are a lovable being in any sort of fashion. They tend to play it cool in general, but.. this is something that they are somewhat vulnerable and rather self-conscious about. So actually getting this feeling expressed is a major step towards Atieno actually being okay being romantically close to beings.

Hair. Atieno tends to have several main hairstyles - the most common is shaved sides with braids as a braided mohawk. But they also where just long black, blue and purple streaked hair as a bob, as an afrohawk, as long hair down their back. It tends to shift and depend on where they are and what they are feeling like doing. It’s really nothing at all for them to shift their hairstyles but they take a little bit of joy in playing with the styles available to them.

It had been years, so many years.

Time has a way of passing by quickly once one gets used to this long-living existence. Zora could remember the days where they were just getting used to the idea of being practically immortal. Days where time seemed to go so slowly and it felt impossible to imagine what the future would look like.

And yet.. here they were.

Centuries upon centuries upon centuries later. And they were still roaming the universe. They had changed forms a few times, still keeping that ethereal nature, the look in their eyes remains the same. But they may have more limbs than one might have remember. Maybe more eyes, too.  Additional markings on their ‘skin’ making their cosmic nature all the more obvious.

In that time, they’ve created so many things, Artwork strewn across the galaxies, across the skies even at that point. Finding a way to hang art in the stars was a discovery that they had cherished, celebrated by showing it too all who would be willing to check it out. They had simply been so excited.

Despite this excitement, there’s a loneliness with it as well. Most of their close ones, their loves had either moved to other situations or passed on years upon years ago. The memories that they had though still linger on their mind, often being drawn into their creations. A long lost portrait here, a sketch there, a spell in memory of those they cared for. It was like Z never could quite let someone they deeply adored go, not friends, not family, not anyone if they allowed that sort of closeness.

Perhaps this is why they had been so cautious about getting to close back in the day. When one is used to hiding so much of themselves, those that they could open up to in those younger years.. those were the people that Zora would keep with them always. It hurt to do so but it was a hurt that kept them company, it was those dreams, those visions of familiar faces and sounds that kept them going. That provided dedications to whatever adventures they would get into.

And at their age, despite not moving quite as fast as they used to, Z is certainly still on the move. Practically bouncing with a practiced ease among the universe, strolling with families and new associates alike, they remember ..they remember people saying they would get more confident with this existence as time passed by and.. those people were right. Zora had recognized that correctness at the time but knew it wasn’t really until they reached this point themselves that they knew how right they were.

Still, there was a certain satisfaction to having this experience, of shifting, of changing and yet being.. of carrying a cosmic narrative across time, across universe. To know that the nugget inside themselves that made Zora who they were only became more prominent over time. The lessened self-consciousness was such a deep comfort to them.

For so long, Zora had only wished to have the chance to just be and had to reserve it to specific people. Now they’ve had their chance .. it just took a hell of a long time to get there.
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Basic facts: - into the beyond (version tag)

Presenting around 50-55, actual age is unknown at this point. Time is weird and aging is who cares (it may be centuries, we just don’t know - so they’re coming in from the far future baby.). Eccentric style still there, although they do more overtly dress for comfort. Layers, nice fabrics, fun patterns, cool jewelry. Does have streaks of purple and white in their hair.

In this verse, they disappeared off the planet to do some exploring and deal with space shenanigans. Likely to have some dalliances along the way, left some artwork among the stars as they had dreamed of doing so. May be found in other locations in this version of the self, can be residing off-Earth as well (location flexible, really).

Less likely to care about shifting into weird forms. Markings are now much more obvious all over the body, including that fractal tattoo that remains covering their back. Eyes shown as white by default cause fuck it. They’ll just be the odd older person who is just doing their thing, still learning about what has changed since they’ve been gone.

Still doing rituals on a regular basis, and creating art -surviving and now in a position to actually give advice from time to time. Although they are still somewhat reserved about doing so since their life circumstances are not always the most.. relatable to say the least.  Sometimes there are moments where they won’t want to say much at all, since there are things that they’ve seen that are way too difficult to express to anyone else - nonetheless translate them into meaningful information.

Because most of those that they have known have passed, Zora does carry a certain melancholy about that and so they do try to be out and about - quietly social in ways that feel comfortable to them. Which is likely why…as a person, they kind of act like a cool ‘auntie’ to whoever wants that kind of figure in their life. And prone to tell ‘stories’ that they play off as fiction but if one looks closely in their eyes, they know are way too real. Will make sure people are taken care off, still enjoys a good snack - may have access to some really..interesting treats if one gets close enough to them.

 

Any weird energy things that they may have hidden as a younger person are now much more obvious, like even their touch as a more obvious cosmic power to them. They just can’t be bothered hiding any more and they’re quite happy about it.

May be prepping for their next iteration.

As someone who has been terribly self-conscious and self-aware of their own behavior and environment and.. just existence in general, Zora does a lot of processing. A lot of unpacking on a regular basis, most of which never really hits the light of day, or the ears of anyone else. Maybe it gets puts into a notebook, maybe a sketchbook. One day it may develop into a piece of work that draws the viewer into layers that they were not prepared to witness. Oops.

very early in my life, it was already too late. Why was that something that they wanted to revisit? Why was that something that felt all too familiar?

Nonetheless, there are a lot of questions. A lot of wonders of whether the pathways that they took were even the right ones. Already growing up in a strange place that was never going to make sense to the outside world, permanently shaped by and somewhat attached to that place. They should have known that the society outside of there wasn’t quite going to work for them in so many ways.

And while they are surviving, they are doing what they care for to support themselves - the facades, the distance, the perpetual evasiveness. the sheer amount of tension. So much of the things that they notice about how they move in this world leaves them in a strange place. Especially when they suspect that there aren’t very many options.

They feel like they’re at a crossroads in recognizing that from the get-go, from the start - things were always going to take a turn. Perhaps they hadn’t known in which order these turns were going to come. And frankly, if some information had been revealed to them earlier - they may have handled some of these turns better.  But the more that they dig to the core of how do they manage, the more the only actual models that they have for life are for those who have leaned far, far, far into what they have only started to really embrace recently.

And it’s weird cause… before all this, before going out - maybe they would have gotten to that point more comfortably. Maybe in the midst of all kinds of mess, but it would have gotten to that point. How are they somehow relearning to be unashamed, unabashed about so much that feels so fundamental to their being? That makes them ultimately an awkward if not unsettling fit for the world at large?

How does that play out in how they will choose to spend their time? Because like it or not, Z knows that they have plenty of time and for once that does not bring them any comfort. It just leaves them.. terribly uncertain, and somewhat inclined to revisit any exiles that they’ve heard about. It seems like that’s going to be very useful in the coming future. At least as a potential possibility.

A few days away seemed to be exactly what had been needed. Once they had left the house in the care of a friend, Saima roamed out to the woods for a while. They felt the need to just lay on the ground and hear out what the forest had to say. And so much was said. Even with them remaining silent as they rested under the night sky, Saima felt the waves of messages go through them.

There were moments where the occasional animal - sometimes a Lynx, sometimes birds would sleep nearby and that was no problem. They had rested among creatures before and had no hesitations to do so again. These moments of reminding themselves of that inherent wildness and natural comforts was reassuring in ways they could not express. The sounds of their surroundings was like music to their ears, forming a rhythem and expressiveness that they cherished deeply.

After time of laying about, they found themselves able to walk around. A few snacks brought with them, a few things picked up along the way - they were able to sustain themselves on fairly little. The feeling of the ground beneath their feet let them place spells on themselves and their surroundings, letting the energy just flow through them as if they were merely a conductor.  That electrifying feeling was healing - making them feel anew. The height of this venture was a few days end, Saima spending time in the bogs in the countryside - between the swampy environment, the water and the sheer distance from civilization, they had never felt so at home. To be away from the responsibilities that they carried, to not be bothered for a few days with anything but wandering..it felt like their core was fed.

A note to themselves, they would have to do this sort of thing more often. There was nothing like dropping out of society in a more complete fashion just to reach the world that more closely felt like their own.
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your smile so super quiet.

A phrase directed their way from someone they helped from time to time. Sometimes it had to be enough to help people talk through their ideas for creations, to point out different directions where they would go.

When an idea would really appeal to their sense of fancy, to the otherworldly nature that barely lurked beneath their appearance. As if it didn’t spill into the ways that they moved, that they gestured. As if it didn’t register in the way that their voice carried in means that seemed unnatural.

But still, if there was an idea that made them feel truly warm.. Saima would return a little smile. So quiet and yet deafening at the same time. For them to explain further would be too much, say too much that humans may not easily handle - especially not in the modern world.

The modern world had forced a lot of changes to the way that stories were told. Saima just had to adapt as they usually did. But that quiet smile had stayed with them throughout the years, a signal that something had reached them - and reached them deeply. It was a feat that felt difficult to do but not entirely impossible… just difficult.

Which made it all the more impressive when that little smile would actually come out. Made people wonder, what exactly had caused that response?

But Saima could only say so much- maybe pointing to a casual detail or a phrasing of words that would serve as enough of an explanation for people not to press any further. In most cases that would be enough, and when it wasn’t, they could only shrug a bit in response.

“There’s something about it that just really works for me. I apologize for not being able to put words to it.“ There were feelings that words could not readily express and the words that they did have always felt horribly inadequate in setting the scene.

And so that quiet smile returns, somewhat apologetic, but sincere nonetheless in affirming the creation that is to unfold before them.

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  Some days certain songs take Saima way back to earlier days. Days before intrusions, before having to hide themselves, to force guises that stuck in weird ways. And never did suit them the way that they wanted them so. These songs repeating in the back of their minds conjures memories of roaming, of being among the creation of these songs. Of having the songs passed down to them so that they could spread it among others.

Perhaps they were missing that feeling of being around a mentor. Of someone who clearly had an idea, had ways that were central to the purposes Saima wanted to fulfill in some form in fashion. They missed the Old Wizard deeply, the one of song, literature - they missed the moments of hearing directly, listening carefully to every phrase, every note of each song. To studying the ways that such creations had an impact, had somehow influenced the realm around them.

The way that song could just weave through someone, through many people at once had never really been lost on Saima. They had learned it firsthand and welded that ability in their own journey. It had taken them through many eras, shifts, developments, struggles. Only to come out to the other side - feeling that more than ever that these songs, stories were incredibly necessary.

Maybe it was the changing season, the slow creeping towards Midsummer that’s getting these thoughts surfacing so intensely. The season cycle always did manage to bring out the multitudes that come with having lived such a long life of riddles and mysteries. Nonetheless, one must get through the Spring Solstice first - and that enough is something of an occasion, to say the least. Still, the fact that their surroundings are starting to liven up once more - and the hidden side of their people. Having dual, no, multi-layered sense of self really does make one very aware of the changing of the seasons. Hiding away, keeping to oneself through most of the colder days felt like something that should and does come quite naturally to Saima.

But the change to bloom, oh how they cherish and crave that opportunity to open up and bloom in the sun. May the warmth allow them to accept and to seek out ways to share that wondrous contentment and joy with others. To let the song take them back to another time while threading them to the present and possibilities of the future. It is a wish that burns at their core, driving them in a way to let the wistfulness that comes to mind make them a ‘wizard’ in their own right. Such is the ways of their restless nature, to spread what was shared with them.. and maybe just maybe make an impression that truly lasts.

 For someone who spent her time gazing at the stars and wandering around the other worlds, a situation like this still left her speechless. For someone who was used to feeling composed when it comes to meeting new people and was capable of keeping a casual guard while becoming familiar..this left her speechless. 

 It’s kind of strange how the fire makes you feel huh?

 To know someone truly carrying the burden of the universe. 

 “If you’re going to look at me that way, you might as well kiss me.”